Chaos

So here is the deal. I’ve got this crazy bunch of emotions piling up inside my chest, inside my mind, inside my body. I just can’t figure it all out. Everything is a battle within my soul right now. I can’t think straight. My soul it sighs. A deep sigh. So profound and spiritually physical that I can’t distinguish it. Is my body physically aching? Or is this just an emotion running deep down inside of me? My mind thinks of it over and over. Picking at every detail, trying to solve it out the best way I know how. The problem is that there is an unknown variable that I never counted for. God. He’s changed the whole dynamic. The whole layout. I don’t know what to expect anymore. My past predictions and encounters don’t line up this time. I CAN’T FIGURE IT OUT! I hate not knowing things! What am I gonna do! I can’t handle this pressure and strain and confusion!!!! I stretch out my hands and lift up my heart in all of its pain and frustration and then….I can breathe.